Honestly speaking, I do not know where do I start or what to write. I have so many ideas in my mind, I even jotted down to take notes but none of these matters right now. I can’t think straight, my emotions are on a roller coaster. I think it has something to do with hormone issues as I have miscarried before the year ends.
I don’t want to welcome my new year with dramas, but I have to honor my feelings. This is what I am feeling right now, it’s okay to feel it, but not to dwell on it. As of a moment I will SURRENDER. Right now I’m completely letting go. I want to love each moment for what it is. I want to allow instead of resisting. I want to sit among nature with nothing to do besides amazed at her beauty. I want to eat foods without feeling guilty. I want to breathe deeply. I want ease and joy. Most of all, I want love.